Bippoty, Boppoty, Boo

One of my biggest fears is that I won't get all the Classic Disney movies on DVD before they're put back in the vault. What if I dont get them in time, and then they become only a figment of my imagination? My kids will never get to enjoy my guilty pleasure of watching Beauty marry the Beast, or Cinderella being made a carraige out of a pumpkin. They wont get to cry crocodile tears from watching The Fox and the Hound, or be frightened by Medusa as she forces Penny into the mine to retrieve the legendary diamond encrusted inside a skull--have no fear, Bernard and Bianca saved her!

Disney movies will teach you all the important life lessons. Pheasant Aladdin becomes a prince. Jasmyne is princess and definately has the right to be shallow--she's royalty, it's bred inside of her! And yet love conquers all, and she picks him to be her husband! Copper prevents his master from killing Todd by stepping in front of the shotgun! This is a true friend, lemmee tell ya!

The biggest, the baddest, and the strongest can't pull the sword out of the stone, and yet a scrawny little kid completes the task without much effort! If you want something bad enough, and you put your whole heart into it, you'll surprise yourself with the outcome. If you ever feel the urge to lie, think about Pinocchio for goodness sakes! That'll make you think differently!

Stupid Cupid, Stop Picking On Me...

As I sat in the crowded theater full of nothing but couples, I had two options: either feel sorry for myself because once again, I was alone for National Lovers Day, or be happy for those that found love and hope to God that one day I'd get that chance.

With much effort, I was able to pick the latter; not an easy feat I might add, but it was done nonetheless. Afterall, my poor soulmate didnt have to empty his pockets buying flowers, frantically call restaurants for last minute reservations no doubt, or buy chocolates that would add even more layers to my Buddha belly!

So when you get down to it, I'm actually doing some good, you know....me being single for eternity!!

That Explains it...

We were learning about different personality disorders last week and I'm pretty sure that I've got a mixture of several. It's kind of scary. I'm slightly avoidant, meaning I somtimes shy away from social situations for my fear of rejection. I can be extremely OCD about certain things, meaning there's certain fears that I obsess over and then under compulsion, I try to resolve these fears and weaknesses. My supersitions fit into this category.

However the one that really explains me is the dependent personality disorder. I have a really hard time making my own decisions, I'd rather someone else make them for me. Or at least give me output. I'm so dependent on others at times that I've actually developed a huge tolerance for verbally abusive and dysfunctional relationships. I've actually apologized to someone for cussing at me, justifying it as somehow being my fault!! And if that didnt seal the deal, I have an intense fear of behing alone. My biggest fear is dying alone, I hate being in the house by myself and I hate doing things on my own--shopping, eating, etc. In fact, the only time I dont mind being alone is when I'm travelling on the wide open highway, singing to my favorite songs. Or maybe taking a nice poop?!

...I crave companionship.

Does That Blue Moon Ever Shine On You?

No one made Italian food like Steve. And I miss him so much. And although I was little, I miss Nick's smiling face as we walked into the store, the turkey mounted behind the cash register, and the soft served ice cream that we always bought in the summertime after a long day of fishing at Cambell's pond. There's times when all I do is reflect on the past, not all the time...okay I should rephrase that statement. I hold onto the past with all my might--that kind of tight grip, knuckles white, sort of deal.

No one makes turkey salad like Uncle Wally. No one makes chili and apple cake like my Momma. And no one's spaghetti even compares to my Daddy's. Although I've tried these different things, it seems that in my mind, no one will ever top these recipes that have been my favorites for so long. There's no use in even trying.

That's the problem with me. I'm so content with keeping things the same that when they get all mixed up, and switched up, I don't know how to cope. I'm so content with the ones that have impacted my life in such a good way, that I forget to let others into my circle.

I'm the same person I've always been. I know what I want in life. Unfortunately it doesn't always go as planned. Maybe I'll look back on this in ten years and thank god for those unanswered prayers. Only time will tell.

I See Red....

I hate that with little effort at all, someone can say something, even the littlest of things and it get under my skin.

I hate more the fact that my friends know these exact buttons to push. That at times I can get so mad, I want to spit nails! My words get twisted, I see a sort of fire and well, it's a good thing I'm not generally a violent person.

I thank god though, that not all my friends are friends with each other. That when I get so angry I want to cry at one of them, I can call up Bobby JO and rant all my worries away.

Don't Bother Serving...

Repulses Me:
Cumbers
Celery
Brussels routs (totally spell checked that bitch!)
Raw Peppers
Raw Onions
Raw Brocoli
Asparagus
Hot dogs
Cantaloupe
Honeydew
Watermelon
Blue Cheese
Really all cheeses excetl: feta, provolone and parmesan
Dr. Pepper
Mt. Dew
Tea
Coffee
Chili--except for my Momma's
Iceburg Lettuce
Eggs
Bacon
Ribs
Ham
Sasage
Spam
Bologna
Potted Meat
Scallops
Mussels
Oysters
Lobster
Beans
Sweet Pickles
Mayonnaise
Mustard
Horseradish
Tartar sauce
Dressings except: Ranch and Oil & Vinegar
Pringles